Tag Archive: Need coffee- stat!

Apr 05

Sleep Deprivation: The Husband Edition


Happy Friday, and not a moment too soon! I’ve come to the conclusion that my Monday through Friday life has become a series of “I want your head on a fucking stick” moments and gratuitous video game violence peppered with “That’s what she said” jokes on Team Speak, in between moments of sanity and productivity …

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May 21

Hanging Up: My Customer Service Skills Went to Shit This Weekend.

Overall, I had a pretty good weekend. I leased out all but two properties off campus last week, my patio garden is looking bright and beautiful, and I had a night out with the girls on Saturday. I spent most of the day Saturday playing video games in lieu of eating, so starting the night with a …

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Apr 04

How do I sleep at night? I don’t. I use The Force to heal.

Damn, I’m tired. Not just “I could go for a nap” tired. We’re getting into “delirious waking fever dream as entertainment” kind of tired. “Challenge a clown to a knife fight because I don’t like his squeaky nose” kind of tired. “Stab a tenant with a bic pen and use their blood to fingerpaint the …

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Jan 08

Zombie Jobs and Dragon Bill Gates – Your Monday Recipe Review

I have some sage advice for you folks: don’t drink coffee at 9:00 PM and then go to bed at 10:30. I spent all night dreaming that it was the evening of the apocalypse and buildings were exploding, the streets were deserted and zombie Steve Jobs came riding in on a dragon Bill Gates. Needless …

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Sep 29

Who jizzed on your frosted mini wheats?

I found something I wrote a few years back about how ill-tempered I can be first thing in the morning. In my adult life, I’ve gone through some rabid phases of insomnia where I went a few days at a time without more than an hour or two of shut-eye per night. Back then, I …

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