Tag Archive: get off my lawn

Feb 27

Some days aren’t worth the tissue you sob into.

Because it's not gross if it's your saliva.

I’ve been in this industry for a while now, and as with any job or industry out there, if you spend long enough marinating in it, you’ll develop a sixth sense about things. I can look at a group of prospective clients as I walk into an appointment and know that they’ll be high maintenance …

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Jan 02

The Rabid Nutball Has Returned.

  Happy 2013, people!   It’s been a long hiatus, and I wish I could say that I was taking a much needed vacay, but that’s not really true. November and December are my busiest months because I generally go from 95% vacancy to about 20% vacancy in a whirlwind 3 weeks. I worked a …

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Nov 05

Dumbest phone call ever.

I’m never going to have time for a real blog again, so instead, I’ll give you another installment of “Why college students should be locked in a mental ward until age 30.”     Thank you, silly undergrad skank, for interrupting the only 20 minutes I have today in which to shovel food in my …

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Apr 13

WTF Friday: That awkward moment when fat fingers almost result in pregnancy.

Fair warning for the boys – there’s some girl stuff here. Cover your ears. I’d mentioned a few months ago how I got a new doctor and we went about doing my life story before moving on to my annual wellness exams. Without going into too much detail, it basically became a fact finding mission …

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Mar 02

WTF Friday: Gimme my Depends and Ensure.

There comes a time in our lives when we must accept the inevitable defeat of age, compile our bucket lists, and then don our circulation enhancing compression socks, kick back, and wait for the sweet embrace of dementia to squeeze the crap into our Depends. And here, at the ripe old age of almost 31 …

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