Category Archive: Soap Box

Feb 12

Fuck Kale.

I’m not going to apologize for the extended hiatus. Life happens, quickly, and before you know it you’re 2 jobs and 3 years removed from where you were the last time you documented it. I had an unexpected change in employment late last year, took 2 months off, and am now working 2 jobs for …

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Jun 25

More Love Letters of Doom

Let’s play a game of riddles!   What has two thumbs, is working this weekend, and has a less than positive attitude about it?   If you didn’t know that I was referring to myself, then you’re obviously new here. Welcome. And brace yourself.   It just so happens that the 30th, and termination dates …

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May 29

Congratulations: you’re a social atrocity. Fix it.

I received what is possibly the greatest voicemail of my entire life yesterday. My friend and I have a standing date at 6:15 on weeknights to go to the gym. Over this holiday weekend we’d gotten a bit lax and when she left after dinner on Monday she said “Gym tomorrow – no excuses!” I …

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Nov 09

WTF Friday: Letter to the Unwashed Undergrads

Dear Undergraduate Population Throughout our Great Nation, You little bastards are disgusting. College kids should have to be wrapped in plastic or body condoms or something, and then prohibited from touching shit. I think I just wiped snot and a particularly virulent strain of syphilis off the public facing side of my desk. No joke-  …

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Jul 25

I’m gonna kick you in the taco, hobag.

So as I slip further and further into this debillitating bout with STS (short timer’s syndrome) I find it easier and easier to shuffle off the ball and chain that is work. Example: I have spent all day thus far answering phones and filing occasionally while watching Netflix and also crafting at my desk. Coworker …

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